The Bus Ride From Hell

I will never complain about travel again in my life after my experiences from the last few days. For some reason I thought it would be a good idea to take a public bus 30 hours from Vientiane, Laos to Hanoi, Vietnam. The price was the major motive for my decision, but in the long run I only saved about twenty dollars by choosing the public over the sleeper bus (the total trip cost about 20 USD). So to start I had to take a bus from Vang Vien to get to Vientane before I could even begin my journey. The ride was only four hours long, but it was incredibly brutal. I unfortunately was sick that day to begin with and my stomach was giving me problems, which is not a good thing when on a toilet-less bus. I picked the back right seat of the bus which was totally full, so I was incredibly cramped and the worst part was that I was so cramped that my right arm had to be put out the window. I was wearing a tank-top and the incredibly bright sun burned my arm very badly. I was aware of this for the entire trip, but I could do nothing to stop it. To further add to my stupidity, I had heard that Laos currency is worthless outside of Laos, so I decided to spend it all before getting on the bus. I do not know what I was thinking, but that was the worst idea I have ever had. Finally, after four excruciating hours I arrived in Vientane, burned and sick as a dog. I then had to wait at a public bus station for six hours waiting for the bus to Hanoi to leave. When it finally did I realized what I was in for. The bus was literally a public bus. Exactly what it would be in America. People were getting on and off everywhere, the seats were incredibly cramped, and it was entirely full the entire journey. As we began our journey I realized just how screwed I was. I had not eaten in twelve hours, and probably wouldn't be able to do so again until I could find an ATM (there are only 5 in all of Laos) because nowhere takes credit card. To make matters even worse, there was no bathroom on the bus, and as I said before, I was very sick. Every time we stopped, you had to pay 1000 kip (around 15 cents) to use the bathroom (15 cents I did not have). After a few hours I even ran out of water and had no money to buy more. I just decided in my head that I would sleep as much as possible and actually managed to sleep for a few hours until we got to the border crossing. The border crossing was what I like to call a "shit show". People everywhere waiting, no lines, Laotian people jumping in front of me, it was crazy. We arrived at 2 AM and had to wait 5 hours until they opened. It was miserable. It was cold and foggy outside and I was still wearing nothing but the tank top. By the time I finally got to the border crossing to have my Visa examined, I realized that it cost one American dollar to cross. Luckily, a girl was kind enough to spot me the dollar or I would have been screwed. On the Vietnam side of the border, people were coming out of the woods, covered in mud, looking like they just snuck past the border. So weird. I later read that that border crossing was one of the worst in the area. So we finally got back on the bus and it was only another twelve or so hours to Hanoi which I tried my best to just sleep and not think about how terrible the circumstances of my trip were. Finally, I was dropped off at a bus station in Hanoi. I immediately set out to find an ATM, but the bus station was in the middle of nowhere. I was totally screwed. Once again, some amazing people let me jump in their cab to a hostel downtown, which was a lifesaver. I finally made it to an ATM, ate my first meal in almost two days, and used the bathroom for the first time in hours. I think it was lucky I had not eaten, which probably helped me not get sick on the bus. In hind sight, that extra twenty dollars in my pocket was not worth it for what I went through. I would not recommend taking the route that I did for anyone even if they did not have some of the extenuating circumstances that I had (lack of money and health). Do it for the story I guess. Never again.